Character Coach / Sports Chaplain Blog

Week Four as a Widower. Formerly, I had to work hard, schedule well, and plan wisely to achieve some solitude. Now, retired and widowed, solitude surrounds me, all day and all night. I, the incurable and unapologetic extrovert, find myself alone…. a lot. In crowds, alone. At church, alone. Waking up in my bed, absolutely alone. I am not as emotional about my loss as I was a few weeks ago. I am more emotionally numb than anything at this point. I have enough tasks to keep me busy presently, but I know after the sale of the house is closed, the banking is completed, and I return from the Congress in Texas, a lot of open space and unoccupied time awaits me. That is worrisome. I have a number of people with whom I correspond daily. I send one set of folks battling disease scripture and prayer. Another few receive a daily prompt for devotional reading. Dozens of sports chaplains across Latin America receive a link to each day’s post of my devotional book in Spanish, which they in turn share...

My wife’s cancer battle consumed the first six months of 2025. It ultimately ended her life on earth, much too soon, and much too painfully. Throughout those months, I was alternately locked in the battle and trying to maintain an equilibrium to our lifestyle. As the weeks, appointments with doctors, treatments, emergency room visits, surgeries, and sleepless nights mounted, I became reflective and tried to make sense of what I was experiencing. Writing reflections in the notes app of my mobile phone became a helpful way of processing all my heart and mind were experiencing. Below are a few of those reflections. They are raw, vulnerable, and gut-level honest. I certainly have a long way to go in my grieving and mourning process. Inadequate and Distracted   – April 2025 How can I, a man who prides himself on self-reliance, achievement, and strength, be so utterly inadequate and easily distracted?  Walking with my wife through cancer treatments, weakness, and incapacity,...