Guidelines for interaction with coaches and competitors

As one builds his/her relationship with coaches and those competing in sport, one can engage them wisely, which will further develop the relationship or one can speak foolishly with them, which will create distrust and inhibit your service with them.

Be a student of the sport. Learn all you can about it by reading, observation and asking good questions. Be careful not to offer opinions which are beyond your level of expertise. For most sport chaplains and mentors, this is a volunteer position; for our coaches and the competitors, it’s their career. We seem like fools if we presume to understand the intricacies of the sport as well as they do. You may, however, have insight into relational issues and matters of the heart which could escape the coaching staff’s notice.

Observe practice sessions and competitions, ask good questions and only offer opinions when asked for them. Below are a number of questions which reflect the attitude which coaches respect and which enable you to learn more about the sport and those in your charge.

At practice – ask these sorts of questions when the conversation would not interrupt, nor be a distraction.
· Coach, I’ve been watching player #___, tell me about him/her.
· How healthy is your team this week?
· Who is leading well for you?
· Which of your players are the hardest with which to connect?
· Which parts of practice are most productive for you?
· How do you discern the motivational keys to your players’ hearts?
· How would you describe your team’s level of unity?
· How good is the team chemistry with this group?
· For what can I pray for you and your team this week?

Prior to a competition – ask these kinds of questions during a warm up session or away from the field, mat, pitch or court.
· How well do you match up against this team?
· How confident is your team coming into this competition?
· Which players have the toughest matchups today?
· How can I pray for you regarding this competition?

After competitions – ask fewer and more direct questions after games, especially if they lost. Many times the right thing to say is nothing, but to communicate love and commitment by simply being present.
· With whose play today were you most pleased?
· Whose leadership was strong in this competition?
· What did your team do best today?
· What did the team do most poorly?
· Who led well in today’s game?
· I noticed (insert observation), how important was that to the outcome?
· I have been and will continue to pray for you, your staff and the team.

Ask wise questions and thereby invite them to share their hearts with you.