Building Relationships with Opponents

In our service of sportspeople it is only natural to focus exclusively on our team, our coaching staff, support staff, and their families. This is right and good. There are, however, others whom we encounter that we can influence as well. Among them are the game officials, administrators, facility personnel, and of particular note today, the opponents.

Without a worthy opponent, our experiences in sport are always training or practice. We need our opponents for sport to be at its best and for sport to provide the tests that are much of its greatest value to sportspeople. In the Kingdom of God, the proper way to relate to opponents is to love and respect them. This obviously runs upstream against the general culture of sport. Let’s consider some ways to build wise and loving relationships with our sporting opponents.

If your opponent has a chaplain or character coach, make contact well ahead of the competition to arrange to meet at the sporting venue or earlier for coffee or just to chat. I have done this many times over the years and it builds my network of trusted colleagues and friends.

If you have met coaches from the opposing team in past years, send an email or SMS message of greeting ahead of the competition. If you are allowed access to the field or court, seek them out to speak in the warm up period before things become more intense.

If you know any of the opposing players, seek them out during the warm up period for a handshake, a hug, and a brief blessing.

When engaged in any or all of these “against the grain” moments, be sure to communicate genuine respect, to model Christ-like love, to bless your opponents, and to pray with them if the opportunity and the relationship allows. Some of my most rewarding moments in sport have included emotional, direct communication of love and respect for opposing coaches, players, and chaplains while standing on a football field or a basketball field, just moments prior to strong competition.

I would challenge you to widen your vision as to who you may lovingly serve. As Jesus was asked, “Who then is my neighbor?” He responded with the story of the good Samaritan. The subject at hand was which is the greatest commandment. Our opponents are our neighbors. Jesus says the commandment is to love our neighbors as ourselves. Let’s transform our view of opponent from enemy to neighbor and thereby model an honorable and loving sport for those we serve and those who watch them.

USA Midwest Region FCA Sports Chaplaincy Training Plan

Sports Chaplaincy is growing around the world and even in the Midwest Region of the USA. In my new role of leading the FCA staff in the states of Illinois, Iowa, Nebraska, Kansas, and Missouri, with respect to developing sports chaplains and character coaches, I have been working on training and development plans for various sectors of the sporting world.

Below is a compilation of the training plan outlines and documents I am developing for these various sectors (high schools, clubs, professionals, collegiate sport, etc.). I hope they are of value to you and I would welcome your insights, comments, and suggestions as we work to facilitate the growth of this expression of ministry in sport.

Training Plan for FCA Midwest Region Sports Chaplaincy

FCA Staff Serving 100% as a Sports Chaplain

1.    Complete the six hour on-line training at www.globalsportschaplaincy.org.

2.    Complete a Fellowship of Christian Athletes Ministry Leader Application – www.fca.org/mla.

3.    Review and sign the FCA Sports Chaplaincy Code of Conduct.

4.    Receive in person FCA Sports Chaplaincy training as offered in the region.

5.    Submit an annual Ministry Development Plan to supervising FCA staff person.

6.    Participate in continuing ministry development opportunities.

a.    Annual FCA Sports Chaplains Conferences

b.    Networking with other Sports Chaplains

c.    Mentor and be mentored by other Sports Chaplains

d.    Monthly conference calls for Sports Chaplains

7.    Be available to learn to deliver training for Sports Chaplaincy; locally, regionally, or globally.

8.    Participate in FCA Communications School as it becomes available in the region.

Training Plan for FCA Midwest Region Sports Chaplaincy

FCA Staff with Sports Chaplain or Character Coach Responsibilities

(Area Representatives, Campus Directors, Area Directors, Multi Area Directors, State Directors)

1.    Complete the six hour on-line training at www.globalsportschaplaincy.org.

2.    Complete a Fellowship of Christian Athletes Ministry Leader Application – www.fca.org/mla. .

3.    Review and sign the FCA Sports Chaplaincy Code of Conduct.

4.    Receive in person FCA Sports Chaplaincy training as offered within driving distance of one’s service area.

5.    Include a Sports Chaplaincy game plan in one’s annual planning.

6.    Participate in continuing ministry development opportunities.

a.    Annual FCA Sports Chaplains Conferences

b.    Networking with other Sports Chaplains

c.    Mentoring with other Sports Chaplains

d.    Monthly conference calls for Sports Chaplains

Training Plan for FCA Midwest Region Sports Chaplaincy

FCA Staff who oversee:

Volunteer Sports Chaplains and Character Coaches

We will interact with FCA Volunteer Sports Chaplains and Character Coaches much in the same manner as we have with FCA Huddle Coaches for decades. We will offer them training, assistance, guidance, resources, encouragement, and direction in order to help them be as effective as possible in their service of the teams, coaches, and athletes to which they are assigned.

      The volunteers may come to you at the recommendation of coaches, parents, church leaders, or from your own acquaintance.

We will require these items from those serving as Volunteer Sports Chaplains or Character Coaches:

9.    Complete the six hour on-line training at www.globalsportschaplaincy.org.

10.  Complete a Fellowship of Christian Athletes Ministry Leader Application – www.fca.org/mla.

11.  Connect with FCA Staff in your area to:

a.    Review and sign the FCA Sports Chaplaincy Code of Conduct.

b.    Discuss service of designated team(s).

c.    Develop a preseason game plan for service.

d.    Conduct a post-season review.

12.  Participate in continuing ministry development opportunities.

a.    Monthly conference calls for Sports Chaplains.

b.    Annual FCA Sports Chaplains conference if possible.

c.    In person FCA Sports Chaplaincy training when offered in your area.

We will request these items from the FCA staff overseeing Volunteer Sports Chaplains or Character Coaches:

1.    An annual game plan for the oversight of Volunteer Sports Chaplains and Character Coaches.

2.    Monthly calls with the FCA Regional Sports Chaplaincy Coordinator.

3.    An annual report of the results of the service of Volunteer Sports Chaplains and Character Coaches.

Training Plan for FCA Midwest Region Sports Chaplaincy

Volunteer Sports Chaplains and Character Coaches

1.    Complete the six hour on-line training at www.globalsportschaplaincy.org.

2.    Complete a Fellowship of Christian Athletes Ministry Leader Application – www.fca.org/mla.

3.    Connect with FCA Staff in your area to:

a.    Review and sign the FCA Sports Chaplaincy Code of Conduct.

b.    Discuss service of designated team(s).

c.    Develop a preseason game plan for service.

d.    Conduct a post-season review.

4.    Participate in continuing ministry development opportunities.

a.    Monthly conference calls for Sports Chaplains.

b.    Annual FCA Sports Chaplains conference if possible.

c.    In person FCA Sports Chaplaincy training when offered in your area.

Statement of Purpose:

Fellowship of Christian Athletes Sports Chaplains, Character Coaches, and Sports Mentors are Christ’s ambassadors among the people of sport. They love extravagantly and they serve selflessly.

Code of Ethics

1.    Chaplains are to be committed Christians who are active members of a local church in regular attendance. 

2.    Chaplains are to ensure a regular and reliable prayer group for their ministry.

3.    Chaplains treat all persons with dignity and respect.

4.    Chaplains serve all persons without discrimination regardless of religion, faith group, race, ethnicity, sexual orientation, gender, age or disability.

5.    Chaplains affirm the religious and spiritual freedom of all persons and refrain from imposing doctrinal positions or spiritual practices on persons whom they encounter in their roles. (However the Christian chaplain is always prepared to give an account for the Christian faith when appropriate.)

6.    Chaplains do not condone or support unlawful discrimination against colleagues or others with whom they have contact in their roles.

7.    Chaplains are accountable for maintaining the integrity of their relationships. They will not use their position with, or knowledge of, another for personal gain. They shall refrain from emotional, financial, sexual or any other form of exploitation.

8.    Chaplains do not engage in sexual misconduct. They will serve in full compliance with FCA’s sexual purity statement.

9.    Chaplains follow professional ethics regarding client confidentiality, sharing private information about those whom they serve only according to those ethics.

10.  Chaplains conduct themselves with integrity in all their professional relationships including those whom they serve, their colleagues, and the organization that they serve.

11.  Chaplains accurately represent their qualifications and affiliations.

12.  Chaplains maintain accurate and current records, finances, or other documents required in the course of their ministry.

13.  Chaplains maintain ongoing personal growth and development in theology, spirituality, leadership skills, and others areas that enhance their ministry proficiency.

14.  Chaplains make referrals or obtain consultations, in a timely manner, when in the best interests of those served.

Standards of Conduct

1.    Meet with another Christian on a regular basis for encouragement and accountability.

2.    Be personally accountable for their conduct to the local FCA staff, respect and seek to observe their policies and procedures. 

3.    Seek the guidance and clearance of the sport’s governing authority to exercise their chaplaincy role. (e.g. NCAA compliance rules, High School administrative rules, etc.…)

4.    Seek to make contact with the sport leadership initially upon their arrival at each meeting/event.

5.    Seek to safeguard the neutrality of their role by avoiding excessive partiality towards any particular group in their care.

6.    Be careful not to be critical of the sports organization’s administrative or regular team practices.

7.    Be a help to sports people and avoid taking sides in disputes or negotiations.

8.    When offered, graciously receive passes, uniforms and benefits, and avoid undue requests for additional privileges for self or others.

9.    Chaplains should refrain from taking advantage of their privileged position. Avoid using or permitting others to use the chaplain’s services to secure unfair personal or professional advantage.

Statement of Faith

·         We believe the Bible to be the inspired, the only infallible, authoritative Word of God. (2 Timothy 3:16-17)

·         We believe there is only one God, eternally existent in three persons: Father, Son and Holy Spirit. (Matthew 28:19)

·         We believe in the deity of Christ (John 1:1), in His virgin birth (Matthew 1:18, 25), in His sinless life (Hebrews 4:15), in His miracles, in His vicarious and atoning death through His shed blood (Hebrews 9:15-22), in His bodily resurrection (1 Corinthians 15:1-8), in His ascension to the right hand of the Father (Acts 1:9-11) and in His personal return in power and glory (Hebrews 9:27-28).

·         We believe that for the salvation of lost and sinful men (women), regeneration by the Holy Spirit is absolutely essential. (John 3:16; John 5:24; Titus 3:3-7)

·         We believe in the present ministry of the Holy Spirit, by whose indwelling the Christian is enabled to live a godly life. (John 14:15-26; John 16:5-16; Ephesians 1:13-14)

·         We believe in the resurrection of both the saved and the lost, they that are saved unto the resurrection of life and they that are lost unto the resurrection of damnation. (Matthew 25:31-46; 1 Thessalonians 4:13-18)

·         We believe in the spiritual unity of believers in our Lord Jesus Christ. (Philippians 2:1-4)

Statement of Values

Our relationships will demonstrate steadfast commitment to Jesus Christ and His Word through Integrity, Serving, Teamwork and Excellence.

Integrity - We will demonstrate Christ-like wholeness, privately, and publicly. (Prov. 11:3)

Serving - We will model Jesus’ example of serving. (John 13:1-17)

Teamwork - We will express our unity in Christ in all our relationships. (Philippians 2:1-4)

Excellence - We will honor and glorify God in all we do. (Colossians 3:23-24)

Ministry Distinctives

·         Christ Centered…focus of our message

·         Bible-based…source of our Authority

·         Spiritually Nurturing…helping people to know and grow in Christ.

·         Kingdom Minded…serving the purpose of the Church.

·         Volunteer Intensive…mobilizing adults to accomplish the Mission.

·         Fellowship Oriented…connecting people through the Body of Christ.

·         Culturally Adaptive…meeting the diverse needs of people.

·         Athletically Focused…ministering to Coaches and Athletes.

·         Faith Financed…funded through people moved by God.

        I agree to serve in full compliance with these standards of ethics and conduct, statements of faith, values, and ministry distinctives.

_________________________________________________________________________Sport Chaplain / Character Coach / Sport Mentor                                                        Date

_________________________________________________________________________Fellowship of Christian Athletes Staff Person                                                          Date

_________________________________________________________________________Sports Organization Leader (Coach, Athletic Director, Club Manager, etc.…)        Date

Ministry in Major League Baseball

Below is an article from the St. Louis Post Dispatch about the chaplain to the St. Louis Cardinals of Major League Baseball. This is a pretty good representation of the nature of sports chaplaincy in Major League Baseball. Here is a link to the article - http://www.stltoday.com/sports/columns/benjamin-hochman/hochman-patrick-is-unsung-hero-for-cardinals/article_a739d378-e5f2-5842-b18c-d3ea2f602d01.html?utm_source=twitterfeed&utm_medium=twitter

Hochman: Chaplain works behind the scenes with Cardinals

February 22, 2016 5:40 am  •  By Benjamin Hochman

JUPITER, Fla. • As he promenaded about the Cardinals clubhouse Sunday, this guy had some sort of a magnetism to him, like a popular ex-ballplayer, back to see the boys. But I didn’t recognize this guy from the mental packs and stacks of baseball cards in my brain. Still, the current Cardinals seemed so comfortable chatting with him; clubhouse employees, too.

Who is this guy?

“We’ve got strength coaches, we’ve got hitting coaches, we’ve got pitching coaches,” he’d tell me later. “I just want to be the guy who’s kind of a spiritual coach, really.”

His name is Darrin Patrick, and he’s important to your favorite players.

He’s the Cardinals’ chaplain, and he’s carved a niche for himself here. He’s a disarming dude the players relate to and still admire. He wears jeans. He sports stylish gray glasses that complement his salt-and-pepper stubble.

The pastor purposely places “man” and “dude” into his dialogue, to personalize his message. He tells them that he’s “the guy who doesn’t need anything from you,” a refreshing notion for players who are constantly tugged. And he’s essential, because he provides balance for the ballplayers.

“I can go through, locker by locker, and not every single guy but quite a few, he’s been there for,” manager Mike Matheny said. “Life happens to these guys. I think people forget that. I think they see them with this persona and they physically look like they have it all together, and emotionally and mentally have it together. But in the meanwhile, we’ve got guys going through rough stuff. Just like everybody else. They’re not immune to it.”

Baseball is a religion, some say. But religion in baseball is tricky. There is a fine line with it all, especially with so many mixed beliefs out there. Clearly, as seen Sunday, when numerous Cardinals sat at picnic tables to hear Patrick speak, religion is important to players. And many fans get fevered about athletes who are also faith-based, for there’s a connection they feel. But there are also times when an athlete can come off as judgmental, as if his or her faith makes someone better, or more complete, than someone not of that faith.

But when it comes to the Cardinals players, it’s very simple: Their lives are complicated and pressure-packed, and Patrick calms them.

“A lot of people will read this article and go, ‘Let’s leave baseball to baseball, and you guys need to be worrying about work,’” pitcher Adam Wainwright said. “But what you have to understand is, we work on Sundays, and for people who find their faith important, our time to then go to church is the chaplain. …

“It’s not an easy job to sit down in front of 20 professional athletes who have large egos and lots of different problems of their own and guard themselves against a lot of different people trying to get into their lives and talk to them. It’s not an easy job to speak into people’s lives, and he’s found a way to do that.”

Patrick himself was a ballplayer, a good one, at the high school level. He played catcher, loved Ted Simmons. At 45, Patrick is a tall man and a strapping man, so he visually fits in around the clubhouse. Another way he connects to players is through his honesty. Of his high school days in Illinois, “I was a mess,” he admitted. “All I wanted to do was have sex with girls, get high and not work. I was an athlete, but I was also the druggie athlete guy. So I could relate to both sides. I know what it’s like to live on the other side of the tracks, so I have zero judgment for people who are struggling in any area of their life, because we’re all in a process. And that’s really my story. I’m just trying to help people flourish, while respecting their journey and process, and at the same time trying to call people to be what they were created to be. ...

“What does that look like? For this season, it might be the dude’s marriage. His dealing with anxiety. His spiritual development. It’s really case by case, year by year, player by player.”

One Cardinals player had a parent who was very sick, so Patrick visited the parent at the hospital and prayed with the family. Another Cardinal, Patrick explained, was “just wrestling with marriage issues, you know?” So Patrick offered advice and an ear. When former Cardinal Shelby Miller got married, Miller asked Patrick to officiate. And perhaps the most common way Patrick impacts the Cardinals is through talks about family, money and boundary issues. How does a player honor those he loves and financially aid those he loves, without feeling overwhelmed or off-put by the whole dynamic?

“Somebody said, ‘Leadership is disappointing people at a rate that they can tolerate,’” Patrick explained with a chuckle.

Now, bad teams have chaplains, too. Praying or dissecting prayer doesn’t make you hit a curveball better. But in an age where, as we know, players have more demands than ever before — physically, mentally, financially, psychologically — it seems that Patrick is a nice fit for this clubhouse. He’s definitely comfortable in there, and the Cardinals are comfortable with him.