In light
of the now sixty-four Head Coaching changes in college football (American
Football) in the USA, sixty-four to date with possibly more to come, below is a
reprise of an article which I ran a couple of years ago in this space. I hope
it informs our hearts as to the issues related to the scores of coaches who
suddenly find themselves looking for jobs and the families whose security has
been compromised.
I recently received a phone call
from a coaching friend who had just been fired. Our lengthy conversation was
full of pain, disappointment, frustration and feelings of betrayal. I was
helpless to do anything except to listen, to care and to assure him that God
knew and cared about his situation.
My friend felt the pain of loss. His
team had won only four games on the season. He had invested hundreds of working
hours and thousands of miles of driving to practices and games for a meager
annual salary. He felt the pain of loss in his wallet and in his heart.
He had a sense of betrayal in that
the administrators had earlier assured him that he was doing the right things
to build the program and that he was on the right track. To now hear that they
“want to go in another direction” left him feeling abandoned and betrayed. The
fact that a couple of players had accused him of intimidating them, without
ever expressing anything like that to him, led to further feelings of betrayal.
He felt deeply disappointed that he
had failed to accomplish the turnaround in the program he had envisioned. He
was disappointed that the values he had been building into the program were not
valued as much as the winning percentage.
The coach felt shame because he was
losing his job and had no immediate prospects for a new one. The administration
also asked him to have no contact with the players and that led to a greater
sense of shame because he values the relationships and investment of years in
the players. The dismissal struck him directly in the heart.
He was indignant that the team’s
accomplishments in academics, recruiting, and individual achievement were
undervalued. He was angry with the cavalier attitudes of those in power over
him, the program and the players. All of them seemed to be treated unjustly by
the administration.
Lastly, he was shocked by the
firing. He had no indications that anything like this was likely to occur. He
had just done post-season interviews with each player and heard nothing to
indicate their feelings of intimidation. The administrators had been positive
and encouraging in their most recent conversations with the coach.
Feelings of shock, anger, shame,
disappointment, betrayal and pain all mixed together made for a tough phone
conversation. He said that he had been trying to pray about the situation, but
felt paralyzed. He couldn’t even pray. He wondered if the Lord cared about any
of these things. I assured him that these things did not happen behind the
Lord’s back and that He surely cared deeply about him, his players and his
work. We prayed together on the phone and we asked the Lord for His grace to
deal with all this situation has brought about. We prayed for the future and
for the Lord’s purposes to be accomplished in the coach’s life as well in the lives
of the players he’s leaving as well as in the administrators who made the
decision.
It is in moments like these that I
most often feel terribly inadequate as a Sport Chaplain. Everything in me wants
to fix the problem. I cannot. My inadequacy leads me to turn to the
ever-listening ear of the Savior for comfort and counsel. Let’s take the risk
to be woefully inadequate and carry our friends’ cares, pain and frustration to
the One who cares for us. (I Peter 5:7)
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